The Shadow Ring - Lighthouse (Lyrics)

This is not my own writing. It is a transcription of the lyrics for The Shadow Ring's album "Lighthouse" from 1999. All credit to Graham Lambkin, Darren Harris, and Tim Goss. This is one of my favorite albums and I couldn't find the lyrics online. Excuse mistakes and gaps.


     Track list:
     
     1 - I am the Black Piper
     2 - I am Lloyd Lyson
     3 - Mindart
     4 - If it is a Boy
     5 - X-Ray My Mind
     6 - Don't Say No
     7 - I am a Lighthouse
     8 - Working for the R.N.L.I
     9 - Lifesavers
    10 - A Vision
    11 - Disrupt the Band's Breathing
    12 - Oyster Shell
    13 - Knock Between Doors
    14 - Black Chalk
    15 - François De Loys
    16 - She's a Cracker
    17 - Pig and Hog
    18 - Fish and Hog
    19 - Egg Mombassa
    20 - Arthuring Tina
    21 - The British Army Can Eat
    22 - The R.A.F. Like a Nibble
    23 - Where Do They Put It
    24 - The R.A.F. Like a Nibble
    
    
    
  1
  
I AM THE BLACK PIPER. 

I AM VISUALLY AWARE. 

I CANNOT SEE ANY DETAIL, BUT I CAN RUN AROUND THE HOUSE FINE.



BLACKER THAN [?] CHICKEN. DRUMSTICKS 
THROWN INTO BRICK HOUSES.

DARKER THAN [?] CHICKEN. LOUDER THAN A FALLING HOUSE. 

BLACKER THAN CUT-UP BONES. DRUMSTICKS 
COME FROM THE [?] . DARKER MEAT 
AROUND THE BONES. LOUDER. HAVE YOU HEARD?



I’M GETTING INTO CHARACTER. I START LIMPING, AS WELL.

DO YOU WANT ME TO KILL IT AND THEN PICK AT ITS CORPSE.



  2

I AM LLOYD LYSON. I AM ONE OF BRITAIN’S LAST LIGHTHOUSE KEEPERS. 

I DON’T LOOK AT IT AS LONELINESS; I LOOK AT IT AS SOLITUDE.



I LIKE YOUR KING ARTHUR. 

YOU ALWAYS LOOK LIKE YOU’VE TAKEN OFF ONE OF THOSE 
HATS, OR MEDIEVAL HELMETS. 



I’VE GOT A PHOTOGRAPH OF ME WITH A PYTHON ROUND MY LEGS. 

IMAGINE A KING COBRA. AREN’T THEY THE LARGEST VENOMOUS SNAKE?



THERE ARE FOUR THOUSAND WILD CATS IN BRITAIN AROUND THIS TIME.

YOU’LL FIND THEM ALL IN SIX DAYS, OR YOU PROBABLY NEVER WILL.



  3
  
TO BE ENCOURAGED BY THE BRITISH EMBASSY — TO BE ARRANGED WITH 
THE NATIONAL PRESS — TO BE ANSWERED BY GUARDS — TO BE ALIVE —



    Oh I like that.
    Repeat it, in the aisle.



TO BE LOST IN A SMALL COASTAL TOWN — TO BE ECHOED RIGHT THROUGH 
EUROPE — TO BE AN ENGINEER — TO BE TRAINED —



    Oh, don’t say that.
    Stop. It’s in the hole.



TO BE BORN AGAIN AS A BOY — TO BE CLEAN AND INNOCENT OF MIND — 
TO SWEEP THE STREETS —



    Oh, don’t say that.
    Do you mean it?



TO BE A DATED BIRTH CERTIFICATE — TO HAVE A BRITISH CITIZENSHIP — 
TO PLAY BALL GAMES — TO BE KILLED —



  4
  
    You’re a textbook King Arthur.

    What are you doing to me.

    You look soooo regal.

    Fancy nipping out for a swift half?



I’M HAVING A BABY.
I’LL WATCH IT DEVELOP
INTO AN ADULT.

IT WILL TAKE APPROXIMATELY EIGHTEEN YEARS.



IF IT IS A BOY, HE WILL WORK ON A LIFEBOAT

SAVING PEOPLE STRANDED AT SEA.

HE WILL NOT BE AFRAID OF HARSH WEATHER CONDITIONS

THAT COULD MAKE HIS JOB MORE HAZARDOUS.



IF IT IS A GIRL, SHE WILL BE A TELEPHONIST

WORKING FOR THE R.N.L.I., ON THE SWITCHBOARD,

PLAYING A VITAL ROLE IN SAVING LIFE.



I’M HAVING A BABY. I’LL WATCH IT DEVELOP INTO AN ADULT.

IT WILL TAKE APPROXIMATELY EIGHTEEN YEARS.



IF IT IS A BOY, HE WILL WORK 

ON A LIFEBOAT

SAVING PEOPLE STRANDED AT SEA.

HE WILL NOT BE AFRAID 

OF HARSH WEATHER CONDITIONS

THAT COULD MAKE HIS JOB 

MORE HAZARDOUS.

IF IT IS A GIRL, SHE WILL BE 

A TELEPHONIST

WORKING FOR THE R.N.L.I.,

ON THE SWITCHBOARDS.

PLAYING A VITAL ROLE IN LIFESAVING.



  5
  
X-RAY MY MIND.



I’VE ARRANGED A DAY OFF FOR YOU TO DO IT.



I’VE CANCELLED VARIOUS APPOINTMENTS FOR YOU TO DO IT.



YOU LOOK AT ME
LIKE A DISTANT SHEET OF POLYTHENE

MIGHT APPEAR TO A SKYBIRD
LOOKING FOR A VOLE IN THE HILLSIDE,

WISHING HE COULD TAKE AN X-RAY OF THE GRASS
SO HE COULD CLEARLY SEE IT.

X-RAY MY MIND.



X-RAY MY MIND.



X-RAY MY MIND.



X-RAY MY MIND.



  6

THE PERFECT SON-IN-LAW

INVITED INTO THE NEST.



WHO THEN GRABBED

AND HELD ON THE NEST.



YOU’RE A TEXTBOOK KING ARTHUR.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME.

YOU LOOK SO REGAL.

FANCY NIPPING OUT FOR A SWIFT HALF?


      Don't say no.
      Don't say no.
      

SAVING LIVES AT SEA.


      Don't say no.
      
    
WE ALL GET A LUNCH HOUR.


      Don't say no.
      

THERE’S NO EYE CONTACT.


      Don't say no.
      

SILENCE ALL THE WAY.
NO EYE CONTACT.
[?] OF SILENCE.


      Listen to what I'm saying to this bloke.
      We're all being paid to work.
      
      
      
  7    

I SAW A LIGHTHOUSE IN THE NIGHT,

PUSHING BEAMS OF LIGHT AT ME.

I TURNED AWAY AND TO FORGET.



I SAW A LIGHTHOUSE ONCE IN A WHILE,

ON AND OFF LIKE NIGHT AND DAWN 

AND DAY. GROWING TALLER, LIKE AN INFANT,

THEN FULL-GROWN, LIKE A MAN.



I TOOK A WALK WHERE COLOR DOES NOT GROW

AND I PICTURED MYSELF LIVING THERE.

I GOT DEPRESSED AND AMAZED TOGETHER

WHEN I THOUGHT HOW QUICKLY TIME GOES.



FALLS LIKE RAIN, OR HAY.

I PULLED OUT GRASS AND FLOWERS.

THEY RESISTED, BUT I’M SO MUCH STRONGER.

I WILL MARCH ON AND ON.



I STAYED INSIDE MY HOME

AND STROKED ROUGH MINUTES INTO SMOOTH HOURS.

I AM A LIGHTHOUSE BEAM

SHINING PEOPLE IN THE PAVEMENT HALL.



REMEMBER, WHEN INSIDE, TO FORGET OUTSIDE.

STROKING THE AIR WITH SMOOTH SWINGS.

I STOPPED DROPPING MY GUARD, 

AND I STROKED MY LINE OF DEFENSE.



LIKE AN UNNAMED ENTITY RESISTS.

CATALOGUES AND STREAMS OF LISTS.



A LIGHTHOUSE, THAT’S ME.

A LIGHTHOUSE, THAT’S EASIER TO BE WITH.



AYE. ON AND ON.



  8
  
I CAN SEE 

A FISHERMAN

WORRYING THE SEA 

WITH THEIR NETS

FROM UP HERE.



I CAN SEE 

A LIFEBOAT

RESCUING 

STRANDED FISHERMEN

FROM UP HERE.



I AM TALKING. 

    DRINK YOUR TEA IN THERE.
I AM TALKING.

    IT SHOULD INTEREST YOU.
I AM TALKING.

    WOMEN WITH GUNS.
    
    

SHE LOOKS LIKE A SECRETARY IN AN OFFICE.



IT WOULDN’T SURPRISE ME IF SHE WAS.



I SAW HER YEARS AND YEARS AGO.

SHE NOW WORKS AS A TELEPHONIST

FOR THE R.N.L.I., I BELIEVE.



SHE NOW WORKS FOR THE BRITISH EMBASSY,

SORTING OUT PEOPLE’S APPLICATIONS.

DECIDING WHO IS FIT TO LIVE AND WORK IN THIS COUNTRY.

DECIDING WHO SHOULD WORK AS A TELEPHONIST FOR THE R.N.L.I.



  9

VIKINGS BEING PHOTOGRAPHED IN THEIR LONG BOATS.

ALL SMILING AND WAVING AT THE CAMERA.

THEY WEAR THEIR HORNS UP FOR BATTLE.

THEY WEAR THEIR HORNS DOWN FOR RECREATION.

THEY DON’T POINT THEIR HORNS LEFT AND RIGHT FOR BATTLE.

THEY POINT THEIR HORNS FRONT AND BACK FOR RECREATION.


  
VIKINGS LITERALLY WALKING INTO BRITAIN

ACROSS THE LOST CONTINENT. 

NOW THEY’RE BEING DISCUSSED IN COOMBE HOUSE.



I CAN HEAR PLANES COMING IN.

I’VE GOT “GATWICK EARS.”

BREAK A LASER.



VIKINGS BEING A BIT NAUGHTY.

MUCKING ABOUT A BIT AT SEA.

NATURALLY, THEY GET INTO A SPOT OF BOTHER.

BUT WHO CAN THEY CALL TO?

DID VIKINGS — I’M ASKING YOU — 
DID VIKINGS HAVE LIFE SAVERS?

DID VIKINGS HAVE LIFE SAVERS?
DID VIKINGS HAVE LIFE SAVERS?

DID VIKINGS HAVE LIFE SAVERS?

I’M ASKING YOU.

DID VIKINGS HAVE ENOUGH FORESIGHT TO BUILD

LIGHTHOUSES ALONG THE COASTLINE?

SOMEONE DID, BUT IT CAME BEFORE THEIR TIME.

THERE’S ONE AT DOVER CASTLE.

DID VIKINGS — I’M BEGGING THE “Q” —
DID VIKINGS 	HAVE TO QUEUE UP AT THE GATES?
DID VIKINGS HAVE TO QUEUE     UP AT THE GATES?
DID VIKINGS 	HAVE TO QUEUE 	UP AT THE GATES?

DID VIKINGS 	HAVE TO QUEUE 	UP
AT THE GATES?



  10
  
    i saw a vision of myself
    in a hospital bed
    being wheeled off for surgery.
    i had some water on my lips.
    i had a wound on my chest.
    certainly around that zone.


    you must remember it was a vision.
    details can sometimes be very vague.


    this isn’t some fantasy.
    vanishing any household fantasy.
    facts aren’t going to start walking around.
    i’m going to apologize between the door.
    there are reasons for [?] .
    it’s not just the [?]
    that breaks up death with life.


    i saw a vision of myself
    in a hospital bed
    fighting for life.
    i’m not a German or anything,
    and i’m certainly not an American.
    in some respects i don’t [?] ,
    and the vision shows me dead.



  11
  
DISRUPT THE BAND’S BREATHING.

    SULTANS ARE TALLER LYING DOWN.

DISRUPT THE BAND’S BREATHING.

    YASIR ARAFAT IS A GOOD HAND WITH IT.



LOOK AT MY MOUTH TO SEE A SMILE.

HAIR AND HAND IS WHAT MAKES ME SMILE.

IT’S NOT HARD TO STOP LYING ABOUT YOUR AGE.

IT’S NOT HARD TO "SAUNTER DOWN" 

AND "STRETCH ABOUT."



DISRUPT THE BAND’S BREATHING.

    STOP INSULTING ME, WOMAN.

DISRUPT THE BAND’S BREATHING.

    HANG ON TEETH THAT ARE NOT SMILING.



AND I KNOW FULL WELL 

WHO’S TRYING TO GET 

INTO BRITAIN

WITHOUT A VISA 

OR DOCUMENTS THAT

MAKE SUCH A STAY LEGAL.



DESTROY A LASER

IF IT’S BURNING 

THE NEST FIRE.

EAGLE UP 

BURNING BUILDING.

WHIP UP OVER THE ENGLISH CHANNEL.

WHIP UP OVER THE FIRE.

DO IT.

DO IT.
DO IT.
DO IT.
DO IT.
DO IT.
DO IT.
DO IT.



  12
  
LET THEM EAT PEARL.

MUSKETS POINTED AT THE OYSTER SHELL.

FEET PLASTERED IN SEA ASH

AND JUST ABOUT FITTING INTO SHOES

AND JUST BECAUSE OF THAT

A PEARL FROM A SHELL

ROLLS DOWN TO THE EIGHTEENTH CENTURY

AND HAS A REALLY NICE TIME.



AND CHOCOLATE 

IN ICE-CREAM CANS

FALL OFF SHELVES

AND INTO OUR HANDS.



I'M AN EARLY MORNING MAN.

I KNOW IT'S NO GOOD IN THE AFTERNOON.

I'M STILL SEEING THROUGH YOUR EYES, THOUGH.

I'M NOT LEAVING.
I'M NOT LEAVING.



LET'S THEN EAT PEARL

OR POINTED SHELLS 

BREAK OVER ROCKS

BIRDS FALL ON THE FLOOR

CAN GET ONTO

THE ATMOSPHERIC'S MAP.


    Ello, ello, ello! 
    Oh, what's all this then!


POINTED SHELLS BREAK OUR RUN.



  13
  
CROSSING THE BORDER.

HOPE YOU’VE GOT YOUR PAPERS IN ORDER.

YOU CAN’T START LAUGHING OR SHUFFLING AROUND.

YOU WILL ATTRACT SUSPICION,

EVEN IF YOU ARE TOTALLY INNOCENT

OF CRIMES LIKE: THE ILLEGAL IMPORTATION

OF CONTRABAND SUBSTANCES.



COCAINE

BLUE MUSHROOMS

AND MORE COCAINE.



THE 1735 WITCHCRAFT ACT— BLUE MUSHROOMS IN THE DOCK—

IT’S 1735 AND WELCOME, WARM WELCOME, TO THE CARIBBEAN ISLAND     
OF COLMANS.



A LIFE AT SEA.

YOUR THOUGHTS, PLEASE.

BLUE MUSHROOM.

I’LL BE TINA TONIGHT.

BLUE MUSHROOM.



I DON’T THINK I SEE HOW I GO.

LEAVE KING ARTHUR ON HIS THRONE.

I THINK YOU LOOK LIKE A FILM STAR, ON THAT THRONE.



THEN I SHALL ASSIST ON THE SET,

CHOPPING UP CHICKEN ROLL FOR THE SANDWICHES.

AIDING WITH THE WASHING UP.


    Leave King Arthur on the throne.
    Leave King Arthur on the throne.
    
    
A MAN CALLED MANAGE, 

HELPING WITH THE WASHING UP.

EXCELLENT. I’D LOVE A LYSON LIFE.

LIVING LIKE A LION IN THIS LIFE.

DARE I SAY THE TIGER HAS THE BRIGHTER LIGHTS:

OPENLY REFLECTING SOME STRIPES.

NOT DISMAL TO LIGHTHOUSE BEAMS.



A LIFE AT SEA.

YOUR THOUGHTS, PLEASE.

BLUE MUSHROOM.

I’LL BE TINA TONIGHT.

BLUE MUSHROOM.



  14
  
AUTHORITY WAS STATED.

RANK WAS SET UP.

LIKE THE MOMENT MAN PICKED UP A STICK

AND WAVED IT AT THE DINOSAURS,

OR AIR BEASTS,

USING TWO WINGS,

RUNNING LINES THROUGH THE SKY LIKE BLACK CHALK.



THERE, THE OPPOSITE—

BLACK CHALK—

SHINING LIKE A LION TONIGHT

IN THE LEMON AND LIME LIGHT.



TOAST BURNED TO BLACK CHALK

AND SPREAD WITH A BRAND NEW PRODUCT,

MADE IN ENGLISH

AND PROMOTED AS

"THE REVOLUTIONARY NEW EGG JAM."



AUTHORITY WAS SET UP. 

RANK WAS STATED.

LIKE THE MOMENT MAN PICKED UP A STICK

AND WAVED IT AT THE DINOSAURS,

OR AIR BEASTS, USING TWO WINGS,

RUNNING LINES THROUGH THE SKY LIKE BLACK CHALK.



HERE, THE OPPOSITE— BLACK CHALK—

SHINING LIKE A LION TONIGHT

IN THE LEMON AND LIME LIGHT.



TOAST BURNED TO BLACK CHALK

AND SPREAD WITH A BRAND NEW PRODUCT,

MADE IN ENGLISH AND PROMOTED AS

“THE REVOLUTIONARY NEW EGG JAM.”



HERE, THE OPPOSITE— BLACK CHALK—

SHINING LIKE A LION TONIGHT

IN THE LEMON AND LIME LIGHT.



    François De Loys can keep his ape.
    What was he doing down in South America anyway.



  15
  
    François De Loys can keep his ape.
    What was he doing
    Down in South America
    Anyway. I mean— I ask you.


He was studying the Tarra River.
That’s what.
So leave it out, alright?
Let him have his ape.
Be pleased for him.


    Well, I was only saying.


Just barn it. Keep it shut.
He was studying his ape, alright?


    There is no need to adopt that tone.


Be pleased for him, I say.
Let him have his ape.


    Alright, granted.


He’s studying his ape. Let him be.



  16

SHE’S A CRACKER.

SHE’S A MOTHER.

WORKING IN THE DAY TIME.

RESTING IN THE NIGHT TIME.

PUTTING HER LEFT FOOT FORWARD.

WALKING ROUND THE HOSPITAL WARD.

YES, YOU'RE RIGHT.



YOU'RE THINKING SHE'S MAKING MONEY.

SHE'S SUPPORTING HER CHILDREN.

YOU'RE RIGHT.



MAKING PHONE CALLS.

I THINK I'LL CALL UP A CRACKER

AND INVITE HER OUT FOR A DRIVE.



SHE’S A CRACKER.

SHE’S A MOTHER

IN A MILLION

TO THAT CHILD. 

MILLIONS OF NICE THINGS SAID TO THE CHILD.

WATCH IT PULL IT OFF.

YOUR MOTHER IS DOING HER VERY BEST.
YOUR MOTHER IS WORKING TO FEED YOU.
YOUR MOTHER IS "TOY MEAT."
YOUR MOTHER IS HEALING AND IN PAIN.
YOUR MOTHER IS SMILING TO HIDE PAIN.
YOUR MOTHER IS "SOLDIERING ON."
YOUR MOTHER IS THE LAST TO SLEEP AT NIGHT.
YOUR MOTHER: NOW THAT'S A WOMAN.



SHE'S A CRACKER.

SHE'S A MOD.

WAX IN THE DAYLIGHT.

ROCK IN THE NIGHT TIME.

PUTTING HER LEFT FOWL IN THE WOOD.


  
PIG AND HOG ON THE LIST.
PIG AND HOG 
            AT THE FRENCH RESTAURANT.
PIG AND HOG 
            BUYING GIFTS.
PIG AND HOG 
            HAVE NOW BEEN LISTED.



  17
  
PIG AND HOG 
            SNIFFING AT THE RADAR.
            
PIG AND HOG 
            ATTENDING TO THEIR JOBS.
            
PIG AND HOG 
            RUNNING THEIR VERY OWN LIGHTHOUSE.



VERY SUCCESSFUL, AT THEIR JOBS.

THEY POLISH THE MAIN LIGHTS WITH BRITISH [?].

I LIKE THE WAY THEY SEE DISASTER

AND STOP IT BEFORE SOMEONE LOSES A LIFE.



PIG AND HOG. EVERYONE IN THE BAND WAITS 
TO SHAKE YOUR HAND. 

EVERYBODY IN THE BAND WANTS TO SHAKE YOUR HAND.


      —Hello, boys.
    
    —Hello.


PIG AND HOG SNIFFING AT THE RADAR.

PIG AND HOG ATTENDING TO THEIR JOBS.

PIG AND HOG RUNNING THEIR VERY OWN LIGHTHOUSE.



VERY SUCCESSFUL, AT THEIR JOBS,

THEY POLISH THE MAIN LIGHTS WITH BRITISH [?].

I LIKE THE WAY THEY SEE DISASTER

AND STOP IT BEFORE SOMEONE LOSES A LIFE.



PIG AND HOG. EVERYONE IN THE BAND 
WAITS TO SHAKE YOUR HAND. 



  18
  
Don’t say no.
Don’t say no.


    FISH AND HOG— KEEP STIRRING UP THOSE OLD MEMORIES—
    
    FISH AND HOG— WITHIN ME—
              
    FISH AND HOG— PULLING AT THOSE HEARTSTRINGS—
    
                  WELL BABY, I'M SHAKING ALL OVER.

    FISH AND HOG— I’M LOOKING AT THAT PHOTO—
    
    FISH AND HOG— OF US MAKIN' OUT—
        
    FISH AND HOG— HERE ARE MY TOP FIVE TIPS—


Don’t say no.
Don’t say no.


Don’t say no.
Don’t say no.


    1. THESE DOGS DISAPPEARING INTO A BOX.
    
    2. DIG UP ARTHUR AND CLIMB INSIDE THE BOX.
    
    3. PUT SOMEONE IN A BOX AND CUT THEM TO TWINS.
    
    4. WOMAN IN A CAGE— A WOMAN STANDING THERE—
    
    5. LAY DOWN IN THE BOTTOM OF THE BOX.



  19
  
  I’d like to dedicate this song to the webmakers.


EGG MOMBASSA— STEADY ON THE LINE.

BABY  DON'T  MUCK  THEM  YOLKS  UP  MAN.



EGG MOMBASSA— DOUBLE AT DAWN.

GIRLFRIEND: I’M LAYING IT ON YOU.



EGG MOMBASSA— GET INTO IT, GIRL.

FRIENDS ARE HUNGRY IN THE HEN HOUSE.



EGG MOMBASSA. 
SO RIGHT FOR US.



EGG MOMBASSA— STEADY ON THE LINE.

BABY  DON'T  MUCK  THEM  YOLKS  UP  MAN.



EGG MOMBASSA— DOUBLE AT DAWN.

GIRLFRIEND, I’M "LAYING IT ON YOU."



EGG MOMBASSA— GET INTO IT, GIRL.

FRIENDS ARE HUNGRY IN THE HEN HOUSE.



EGG MOMBASSA. SO RIGHT FOR US.



DOUBLE AT DAWN. DON'T CRACK UP. 

OPEN THE DOORLINE SHELL FOR SIX OF THE BEST.

LAY WAX IN THE DAYLINE. DOUBLE UP IN THE NIGHT TIME.

LET WAX DRIP ON THE HEN HOUSE. 

DRINK ROOT RUBY, AND GET IN LINE FOR DOUBLE EGG. SO RIGHT FOR US.   
                                     DOUBLE EGG. SO RIGHT FOR US.



  20

"ARTHURING TINA."

  HALF AN INCH, I'D GIVE HER.

  AND KING ARTHUR LAYS STILL ANOTHER YEAR.

"ARTHURING TINA."

  CAN'T SEEM TO GET HIM UPRIGHT,

  AND KING ARTHUR IS GRADUALLY HOISTED UP.

"ARTHURING TINA."

  PUSH THE BRAIN BUTTON,

  AND THE CORPSE BECOMES ALIVE,

  AND I LIKE IT.



A
R
T. 
    TURN.
    ARTHURING TINA.
H
U
R.



HALF-DEAD TINA. NOW, ARTHUR IS UP AND WELL,

DRESSED UP IN THE LIGHT OF LIFE AND BREATH.

HALF A DEAD TINA. SHE WAS FULL OF BLOOD, LIKE US.

DRESSED UP IN HIGH STREET CLOTHES; MODERN STYLES.

HALF A DEAD TINA. HASN'T SINCE ARTHUR INSIDE THIS YEAR

SHE DIED, AND I LIKE THAT.



  21

THE BRITISH ARMY CAN EAT.

OUR BOYS HAVE GOT A RAVENOUS APPETITE.

THEY LIKE A FULL PLATE IN WARTIME.

THEY LIKE IT PILED HIGH IN TIMES OF PEACE.



THE BRITISH ARMY CAN PUT IT AWAY.

THOSE BOYS MUST HAVE HOLLOW LEGS, I THINK. 

THEY EAT LIKE HORSES, OR ANY OTHER LARGE ANIMAL.

A BEAR, A COW, A LION, TO GIVE THREE EXAMPLES.



RIDING AROUND IN THOSE LOVELY TANKS

FROM ONE FISH AND CHIP SHOP TO ANOTHER.

RIDING AROUND IN THOSE LOVELY TANKS,

SAMPLING VARIOUS EASTERN DELIGHTS.

RIDING AROUND IN THOSE LOVELY TANKS.

IT MUST REALLY SMELL OF KEBABS IN THOSE TANKS.



THE BRITISH ARMY CAN EAT.

OUR BRAVE SOLDIERS THINK WITH THEIR STOMACHS.

NO WONDER THEY'RE ALL POSTED IN EUROPE,

WITH ALL THOSE EXOTIC FOODS.



  22
  
THE R.A.F. LIKE A NIBBLE

ON THOSE LONG PLANE RIDES.

CHEESE AND CRESS OVER TUNISIA.

TUNA AND FLESH OVER TURKEY.



OH YES, THEY LIKE A SANDWICH OR TWO.

REAL AND STRONG, IN THEIR COCKPITS.

DON'T GET DILL ON THE DASHBOARD,

OR RELISH ON THE READOUT.



BROWN OR WHITE ON THE NIGHT FLIGHT.

ROLLS, LOAF, OR SOMETHING ELSE, PERHAPS.

OH LOOK— HE'S GOT ONE OF THOSE BUN THINGS

WITH THE LITTLE SEEDS.



BROWN OR WHITE ON THE NIGHT FLIGHT.

ROLLS, LOAF, OR SOMETHING ELSE, PERHAPS.

OH LOOK— HE'S GOT ONE OF THOSE BUN THINGS,

WITH THE LITTLE SEEDS.



WHO'S THE LUCKY BOY, THEN?

SOMEONE'S TAKING CARE OF YOU—

MAKING SURE THEIR BRAVE LITTLE HERO

DOESN'T GET HUNGRY AT TEN THOUSAND FEET.



THINK OF DIGESTING PROBLEMS, THOUGH.

THINK OF DIGESTION.

ALL THAT BROKEN-DOWN FOOD, SLOSHING AROUND.



WAS IT WORTH BEING THE ENVY OF THE CABIN CREW, 

WHEN YOU SUFFER STOMACH ACHE ALL THE WAY 

FROM THE R.A.F. BASE IN ENGLAND

TO YOUR DESTINATION IN MAINLAND EUROPE?



  23
  
WHERE DO THEY PUT IT, THOSE NORTHERN OFFICERS?

THEY'RE LIKE PACKAGED WOLVES, AROUND THE BUFFET TABLE.



THOSE BEAUTIFUL WHITE UNIFORMS, COVERED IN DIP.
THOSE BEAUTIFUL WHITES, STAINED.

BEAUTIFUL WHITES.

    NAVY!
—Think.

    NAVY!
—Think.

    NAVY!
—Think.

    NAVY!
—Think.

    NAVY!
—Think.

    NAVY!
—Think.



  24
  
THE R.A.F. LIKE A NIBBLE

ON THOSE LONG PLANE RIDES.

CHEESE AND CRESS OVER TUNISIA.

TUNA AND FLESH OVER TURKEY.

OH YES, THEY LIKE A SANDWICH OR TWO.

REAL AND STRONG, IN THEIR COCKPITS.



THE R.A.F. LIKE A NIBBLE, ON THOSE LONG PLANE RIDES.

CHEESE AND CRESS OVER TUNISIA.

TUNA AND FLESH OVER TURKEY.



OH YES, THEY LIKE A SANDWICH OR TWO.

REAL AND STRONG, IN THEIR COCKPITS.

DON'T GET DILL ON THE DASHBOARD,

OR RELISH ON THE READOUT.



BROWN OR WHITE ON THE NIGHT FLIGHT.

ROLLS, LOAF, OR SOMETHING ELSE, PERHAPS.

OH LOOK— HE'S GOT ONE OF THOSE BUN THINGS,

WITH THE LITTLE SEEDS.



WHO'S THE LUCKY BOY, THEN?

SOMEONE'S TAKING CARE OF YOU—

MAKING SURE THEIR BRAVE LITTLE HERO

DOESN'T GET HUNGRY AT TEN THOUSAND FEET.



OH LOOK! HE'S GOT ONE OF THOSE BUN THINGS
WITH THE LITTLE SEEDS. 

WHO'S THE LUCKY BOY, THEN?

SOMEONE'S TAKING CARE OF YOU—

MAKING SURE THEIR BRAVE LITTLE HERO

DOESN'T GET HUNGRY AT TEN THOUSAND FEET.



WHO IS THE LUCKY BOY, THEN! SOMEONE'S TAKING CARE OF YOU—
MAKING SURE THEIR BRAVE LITTLE HERO DOESN'T GET HUNGRY 

AT TEN THOUSAND FEET.



THINK OF DIGESTING PROBLEMS, THOUGH.

THINK OF DIGESTION.

ALL THAT BROKEN-DOWN FOOD, SLOSHING AROUND.

WAS IT WORTH BEING 
THE ENVY OF THE CABIN CREW, 

WHEN YOU SUFFER 
STOMACH ACHE 

ALL THE WAY FROM THE R.A.F. BASE, IN ENGLAND,

TO YOUR DESTINATION IN MAINLAND EUROPE?


    ALL THE WAY FROM THE R.A.F. BASE IN ENGLAND
    TO YOUR DESTINATION IN MAINLAND EUROPE.
    
    
    ALL THE WAY FROM THE R.A.F. BASE IN ENGLAND
    TO YOUR DESTINATION IN MAINLAND EUROPE.
    
    
    ALL THE WAY FROM THE R.A.F. BASE IN ENGLAND
    TO YOUR DESTINATION IN MAINLAND EUROPE.








(more writing)

The shadow ring lighthouse lyrics